May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here
Y'all act like you never seen
A white person before
Jaws all on the floor
Like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door
And started whoopin her ass worse than before
They first were divorce
Throwin her over furniture
It's the return of the
Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just say what I think he did
Did he?
And Dr Dre said nothing you idiots!
Dr Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement!
Feminist women love Eminem
Chigga chigga chigga
Slim Shady, I'm sick of him look at him
Walkin around grabbin his you-know-what
Flippin the you-know-who
Yeah, but he's so cute though!
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up
In my head loose
But no worse
Than what's goin on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV
And just let loose, but can't
But it's cool for Tom Green
To hump a dead moose
My bum is on your lips
My bum is on your lips
And if I'm lucky
You might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message
That we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know
What a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel don't they?
We ain't nothing but mammals
Well, some of us cannibals
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man
And another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel
I got the antidote
Women wave your pantyhose
Sing the chorus and it goes
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps
To sell his records
Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me
Let alone stand me
But Slim, what if you win
Wouldn't it be weird?
Why? So you guys could just lie
To get me here?
So you can, sit me here
Next to Britney Spears?
Shit, Christina Aguilera
Better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson Daly
And Fred Durst and hear 'em argue over
Who she gave head to first
You little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
Yeah, he's cute
But I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!
I should download her audio on MP3
And show the whole world
How you gave Eminem VD
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups
All you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me
Who just don't give a fuck like me
Who dress like me
Walk, talk and act like me
And just might be the next best thing
But not quite me!
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
I'm like a head trip to listen to
Cause I'm only givin you
Things you joke about with your friends
Inside your living room
The only difference is
I got the balls to say it In front of y'all
And I don't gotta be false
Or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit it
I just shit it
Better than ninety percent
Of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids
Eat up these albums like valiums
It's funny cause at the rate
I'm goin when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person
In the nursin home flirting
Pinchin nurses asses
When I'm jackin off with Jergens
And I'm jerkin
But this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person
Is a Slim Shady lurkin
He could be workin at Burger King
Spittin on your onion rings
Or in the parkin lot, circling
Screaming I don't give a fuck!
With his windows down and his system up
So, will the real Shady please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind
And outta control
And one more time
Loud as you can, how does it go?
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
Please stand up, please stand up?