Life isn't quite what I thought I'd be
When I was a kid on VoIP
I thought when I get older, I'd marry her
I told her
Now I'm 26 and I work in an office
9 'til 5's not the best, I'll be honest
If I could change a single thing
I'd make it me and not him
But he's in your bed
And I'm in your Twitch chat
I've got the key
And he's just a doormat
And even though he's got social skills
That doesn't mean I can't pay the bills
Anyway, make the most of him
'Cause she moves on pretty bloody quick
Oh-oh, your new boyfriend's an arsehole
And yeah, I've met Jared
(Of course I've met Jared)
The one who took you away from me
You hit it off instantly
I know, 'cause you won't stop telling me
I've seen his jawline, shoulders, and muscles
Push against his fashion sense
I've thought about what he looks like nude
I'm not gay, though
Cause she's living the dream
(Living the dream, living the dream)
Oh, she's living the dream
From back when we were 17
She's living the dream
(Living the dream, living the dream)
Oh, she's living the dream
From back when we were 17
How on Earth could I be saved?
When I'm one click away from insane
I just think that I deserve
A little bit of what I earned
I'm not gonna make another scene
The one I made when I was 23
Means I'm not allowed in Disney World
But he's in your bed
And I'm in your Twitch chat
I've got the key
And he's just a doormat
'Cause even though he's got social skills
That doesn't mean I can't pay the bills
Anyway, make the most of him
'Cause she moves on pretty bloody quick
Oh-oh, your new boyfriend's an arsehole
I think about you every day
So how on Earth can I be saved?
I think about him a lot as well
Maybe if he wasn't fine as hell
'Cause you're beauty
And you're grace
Your telephone calls are my favourite place
And I want you to notice me
With no restraining order please
I want you to care
I want to smell your hair